Conflict Resolution

Learning how to resolve your conflicts in your personal life and business life will definitely help you improve and grow. Understanding what makes good conflict resolution and why they have been less than good in the past is what we’re going to discuss.

Most people are immediately defensive when they are approached with a problem to resolve. This is perfectly natural, but defies the resolution aspect of conflict resolution. Remember, it is not “conflict sweeping-under-the-rug” or “conflict cover-up” but rather a resolution; resolutions are generally only obtained when both parties feel happy about the outcome.

I cannot stress enough the importance of listening to the person who has a problem. If you are staring at them without listening, or even letting your eyes wander to the other elements in the room, you are not respecting the person who is talking to you. Making sure the person understands that you respect them, their time, and what they’re saying is very important. Only by actually listening to them will you be able to understand what their problem is and be able to reiterate the information they have given you. If you have a difficult time remembering details, then you should carry a small notepad with you to take notes during such events.

Once you are done listening to their problem, then you need to evaluate what they have said. Is this something that is within your power to solve? For personal relationships such as dealing with spouses or your children, this is usually the case since people who are involved personally with someone will generally approach the person responsible for the problem. In business, it may be that you are not management and you will have to refer to management anyway. Most of the time, if it is not within your power to resolve, then it is within a business setting.

If this is a family setting, then keep in mind that there is more at stake with your family than just something that needs to be resolved. If you ignore a problem, then that problem will become bigger at a later point. It is better to solve the problems in the initial stages instead of waiting until they become potentially destructive.

If this is a friend or an acquaintance, then the dynamic changes enough that their angle is no longer from actual “family love” but rather something they see as a problem affecting your casual relationships. Still, these are important to maintain social health, and in hearing their complaint, try to recognize this is something that is important to them.